I had the last few days off, which was great...minus the fact that I wish I was capable of catching up on all my missed sleep. But of course this should be when I am getting my gym time in as well. What am I if not a great procrastinator. And its all my doing too!
I convinced my motivator (i.e. Kurt) that we didn't need to go to the gym on Tuesday...that we could go on a bike ride now that Kurt has his bike back. Of course we didn't get up until late on Tuesday and by then it was already starting to get hot. So we decided to go to the gym Wednesday.
Wednesday comes around and neither of us wants to go in the morning...so we decided the evening. Then evening comes and I just can't find the motivation...and of course I talk Kurt into going for a bike ride instead...only that didn't happen either.
So I convince him that we will go for a ride this morning...even though the bike seat on my bike (formerly the bike Kurt was riding while waiting for his to be fixed) is awful (its a male seat). Do you want to guess what happened?
6am rolled around WAY to early this morning...and that didn't happen. So now I am sitting here at work...feeling stupid for not going...but still not at all motivated. I was hoping to maybe get off work at a decent time tonight in order to go...but once I got here I realized that wasn't going to happen.
I keep thinking the only thing I can do is try again tomorrow...but then when tomorrow comes around, my motivation is lost again.
Everything is lost. I haven't been eating great (some days I really do try and fail miserably). And that's the big problem...because even if I am not getting to work out or am not motivated to do so, at least I should be eating better...to supply some bit of healthiness to this whole thing.
So slowly today I am going to try to work my motivation back...be it researching some healthy habit things online or at least trying to get a quick walk in while at work (which will most likely not happen because there's so much to do and I want to get home before midnight.)
Maybe I just need something new to do...I'm hoping riding my bike will kick up the motivation a bit...but I think I need to get some free weight for home so that I can start a little strength work. I need a pool. Our community has a pool but it is only open from 10am to 9pm or something like that. Normally I'm at work at that time...but I guess I could do it right at 10am as long as there were not other people there, because I would actually be there to swim and not to float around.
I know that I just need to push through this lack of motivation...part of me wishes that I wasn't working so much and that I could be a hyper focused on the exercise and the healthy eating as I was when we started this whole thing...but then again, it is nice to have a job again (regardless of how much I complain about it sometimes.)
Anyway, it's time to get back to doing work. I'm actually working while doing this but my panoramas are bogging down the computer, so I should close the Internet window. Cassie, I'm looking forward to your recipes (if you already sent them, I didn't get them.) We need a little more variety in our lives.
I'm going to try to be better about this...I know Kurt is too...so until next time. :P
Has anyone ever told you that you are so hard on yourself, Candace?! Geezus!
ReplyDeleteSo what, you weren't motivated the last few days. Everyday is new and you can't feel bad about the past days. Just focus on what to do differently today! If the bike thing isn't comfy b/c of the seat, just walk outside! The point is to move your body, regardless. Sometime having big expectations stunts you into doing nothing when really all you need to do is something small....
Love,
Lisa